Paradise Lost (4)

Publication Date: September 1, 2011

Chapter: English Literature in the Early Seventeenth Century

And all that sympathy I might've generated for Satan just got flushed down the toilet. Hey, he's the Prince of Darkness, people. What do you want from me

The truly sympathetic character here is Sin, the daughter of Satan. She crawled fully formed out Satan's head one day while he was apparently having some kind of killer headache, during which his head was literally on fire. She looked more or less like the other angels, only sans wings. She was also half serpent. Well, more like 3/8th's serpent, as she still had girl parts. Most artists draw her as a normal person, just with huge snake tails for legs. Anyway, the angels named her "Sin," and Satan - apparently not realizing who she actually was - decided to bang her.

After said... encounter... Satan launches his war against God, gets his ass kicked, and is banished to Hell. Sin is also banished to Hell, despite doing nothing wrong, apparently because God is an asshole. This shouldn't come as a huge surprise, since I think we can all agree that Old Testament God was never the happiest of campers.

God does toss her a bone, however, by granting Sin the responsibility of guarding Hell's gate, handing her the only key to the exit. Considering she's still stuck in Hell, Sin isn't terribly grateful.

It's at this point that Sin gives birth to Satan's bastard child, her own brother. Said brother and/or son is Death himself, and he's a ravenous phantom, possessed only with lust and rage. Minutes after having been born, Death chases his mother down and rapes her. Now if you excuse me, I have to hurl.

...

And I'm back. Sin's unnatural... encounter... with Death is what gives life to all the little demon monsters Sin is forced to carry around forever. The little monsters busy themselves by tearing apart Sin's innards and feasting on her entrails.

Literature, everybody!

Author: John Milton • Year: 1667 • Info: Wikipedia

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Lit Brick is a comic started by Jodie Troutman in an effort to read the entire Norton Anthology of English Literature. Having eventually succeeded in that goal, it now features comics about all manner of random literature. For more of Jodie's work, visit longtalljodie.com!