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Piers Plowman

Publication Date: August 23, 2010

Chapter: English Literature During The Middle Ages

Dear God, that was the most boring thing I've ever read. I could literally feel the minutes ticking away from my life as each word passed me by. It isn't often you can feel yourself dying, but the half-hour I spent sitting in that chair reading "Piers Plowman" was one of those times.

The ultimate insult in all of this is that the Norton only prints thirty pages of excerpts from the original work, and completely omits any reference to the allegorical characters of Dowel, Dobet, and Dobest. Indeed, I was robbed of my opportunity to crack wise about those names. This may seem petty, but I was really looking forward to it.

In order to make myself feel better, here's a brief list of a terrible names I could've used in a "Piers Plowman" comic but can't now: Doyourmom, Doitfrombehind, Doitliketheydoonthediscoverychannel, and Doitbyyourselfwhileshedoeshernails.

A comic may or may not have also included the following dialogue: Girl, "As a woman, I'm always looking for Dobest!" Boy, "Well, you may have to settle for Doadequate." Girl, "Still, that's much better than Donothingatall." Boy, "Oh, I dunno. Depending on how nervous I get, you could end up meeting Doitintensecondsandspendtherestofthenightcrying."

I think it really says a lot about me that the verb "do" instantly makes me think of sex. Damn you, society!

Author: William Langland • Year: c. 1370 • Info: Wikipedia

#WilliamLangland   #SelfInsertionFanfic   #TheMiddleAges   #English  

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